Control: Who’s Got It and Who Wants It?

Remember when you were a kid and played King of the Hill? Or you were playing with dolls and one person always insisted hers was the Queen of the Castle? Well, control issues are about that. When one person insists on always being King of the Hill or Queen of the castle, others are reduced to secondary roles. That raises a whole series of questions, for example: Do you prefer to be subservient? Does the secondary position make you feel less valued? Would you prefer to be King or Queen … [Read more...]

Looking for Love in All the Right Places

RELATIONSHIPS ARE ALWAYS A TIMELY ISSUE ESPECIALLY AS THE GRAY DAYS OF WINTER GIVE WAY TO SPRING AND OUR “FANCIES TURN TO THOUGHTS OF LOVE”! So often in relationship counseling I see people blaming their partners instead of looking inside themselves. I hope this article encourages spring cleaning of our relationship skills as well as our houses!! Spring has arrived and many people’s thought turn to love and relationships. There are many obvious advantages to finding a relationship partner – … [Read more...]

It Takes Two – A Way To Understand Relationship Conflicts

RELATIONSHIPS ARE SELDOM AS SIMPLE AS WE WOULD LIKE. They bring out our needs, anxieties, and conflicts with people from our past – parents, friends and former partners. Our relationships with our partners are colored by our own personal legacies. We often react to our partners as if they were someone else – and most of the time this causes conflict in the relationship. After all, when we entered into a primary relationship we expected love, nurturance, and validation just for being who we are. … [Read more...]