Whether you are alone because your family lives far away or because the COVID-19 pandemic prevents you from being together, it is important to think about how you want the Thanksgiving holiday to go. For many single individuals, who make up about a third of all households, Thanksgiving (and Christmas or Chanukah) can feel gloomy or sad if there is no one to share it with. It is hard to ignore all those family scenes in commercials, and joyous songs just don’t make up for a shared meal and hugs … [Read more...]
How to Communicate Better with People You Care About – Part 2
October 9, 2020 By
In the previous blog, I talked about some simple rules for better communication, like avoiding old history and labeling. Today, I Want to add some more complex guidelines that are really useful when trying to navigate a difficult situation with someone you care about. It goes without saying that someone will be more receptive to hearing what you say if you keep your body language open and welcoming. How you look to others tells them how willing you are to communicate. If your arms are … [Read more...]
Advice for Living
September 30, 2020 By
Recently I read an article, originally written by Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg, which was adapted from her book My Own Words. She wrote about the advice she was given that helped her in her personal and professional life, and as I read it, I thought “She could have been a psychologist talking to a patient.” Or a parent talking to a child, or a teacher talking to a student. Her words were directed at women and men and were full of common sense, yet focused enough to be inspiring. Here is a … [Read more...]
Helping Your Anxious Child When School Re-Opens
September 10, 2020 By
For children who already struggled with anxiety, the Covid-19 pandemic has added another layer of worries. And for those kids who were not worriers, this time being home-bound may have started them on some fears that we never anticipated. For both groups, however, going back to school may have caused similar concerns. Recently, a middle-school child told me, “I can’t imagine wearing a mask for hours! At least at home, I don’t have to wear one. And when we go out, I only have to wear it for a … [Read more...]
How to Communicate Better with People You Care About – Part 1
September 10, 2020 By
Recently I was asked to give a talk about how people can communicate better with one another. I was searching my files and found a handout that I have used in my practice for years. It is called The Ten Commandments of Clean Communication. It was given to me by a former mentor, and it has no attribution on it, so I don’t know if she wrote it herself, or if it came from a book she read many years ago. As I looked it over, I thought it was the best set of communication guidelines I have seen, … [Read more...]
The Benefits of Telemedicine
August 13, 2020 By
When the COVID-19 pandemic began, I was unsure of how I would feel about seeing my clients online. It was so nice to sit in my real office, see their facial expressions and body language, and say goodbye with a smile, or perhaps a hug. And for the children that I treat, there was always a stuffed animal to take home or a puzzle to play with. Now that we are 5 months into working virtually, I can say that I truly appreciate the benefits of telemedicine, or telehealth as some call it. … [Read more...]
Helping Anxious Kids During the Time of Coronavirus
May 11, 2020 By
Most of the time, children are resilient. They bounce back pretty quickly. Of course, there are always those kids who have a harder time with change or with difficult circumstances, kids that Dr. Thomas Boyce refers to as the “orchids” in the greenhouse They are the ones who are more sensitive to their environment than usual and require more attention than the average child. Understanding the Orchid Child Today, however, it may feel like every child is an orchid. With the coronavirus … [Read more...]
Stress & Coping in the Time of Coronavirus
April 22, 2020 By
No one needs to tell us that we are stressed about the COVID-19 pandemic. We are all suffering from chronic stress – fatigue, irritability, changes in our eating habits, problems sleeping, difficulty concentrating – because of the uncertainty that this illness brings. And because it has gone on so long, the constant stress disrupts our ability to remember things and pay attention. Just yesterday, a friend put her milk in the freezer instead of in the refrigerator. Another friend called me, sure … [Read more...]
Four Sentences That Lead to Wisdom
February 25, 2020 By
I love to read mysteries. Perhaps that is why I like being a psychologist so much. I think of each person as a puzzle with one or two pieces missing and try to figure out how to help each client find the right pieces to become happier, more productive, have better relationships, feel less anxious, or be better at what they do. Recently, I was reading a mystery by Louise Penny and found a few sentences that really got to me. Here they are. … [Read more...]
Overcoming Imposter Syndrome and Self-Doubt
January 9, 2020 By
One of the most interesting dialogues about women today continues to be their pervasive self-doubt, known as Imposter Syndrome. Many women who have achieved success in business, school, or life in general, still struggle with a belief that they are frauds, that they do not deserve their success, that they have somehow managed to dupe their way up the ladder. They focus on their failures instead of their successes and internalize negative messages they may get from others. From … [Read more...]