How Do You Know If Your Psychologist is a Good Therapist?

In April, I wrote a blog about the courage it can take to start therapy.  After over 25 years as a psychologist, I have discovered that most people noodle around with a problem for a few months before they finally call for a psychotherapy appointment. Some get it right the first time, while others are not sure that they and their therapist are a good fit.  So I thought I would give you some guidelines to help you figure out if you are with the right person to help you solve your problems and … [Read more...]

Childless vs. Child-Free: A Nuanced Look at Two Paths Without Children

In a world where parenthood is often seen as a life milestone, choosing not to have children—or living without them due to circumstances—can be met with curiosity, confusion, or even criticism. Yet, it's important to recognize that there are differences between being childless and being child-free. These terms are not interchangeable; they reflect distinct life experiences, perspectives, and emotional realities. Childless usually refers to people who wanted children but, for various … [Read more...]

Why Seeing a Psychologist Can Be Life-Changing

It takes courage to start therapy. Chances are, whatever has been bothering you has been in your mind for a while and you have not been able to solve the problem on your own. So even if it feels scary, therapy provides a safe space to deal with thoughts and emotions, develop coping skills and improve your overall well-being.      One of the greatest benefits of therapy is that your relationship with your psychologist is confidential and non-judgemental. No matter how much you may be judging … [Read more...]

Avoiding Binge Eating

The December holidays have passed, your New Year’s resolutions have faded, and Super Bowl parties are over.  But you still find yourself perusing the pantry and refrigerator after meals and at night while you watch TV.  You may or may not crave a specific item but your brain is sending you messages about food. Should you have chocolate, cookies, potato chips or finish up the remaining lasagna?  What about a handful of those chocolate chips you were going to use to make cookies for your daughter? … [Read more...]

Cognitive Processing Therapy for PTSD

Joan was a combat veteran who made it through two wartime postings without having PTSD.  She prided herself on her toughness and resilience.  Never did she expect that she would be dealing with Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder ( PTSD) once home in the United States, but Joan was raped while walking on a New York City street by herself one night.  She never reported it, felt embarrassed and ashamed that she had not fought off her attacker, and feared dealing with her symptoms of sleeplessness and … [Read more...]

Election Stress

According to the America Psychological Association’s Stress in American survey, more than 7 in 10 adults said that the future of the country is a major source of anxiety for them, with the presidential election following at 69%.  Worry about violence after the election is a prominent fear as is worry that democracy will end in the United States.  If you are one of those who does not sleep well because of the upcoming election and the stress of politics, here are some suggestions to help you … [Read more...]

Film Review: “Inside Out 2” – Understanding Anxiety’s Effect on Teens (and Adults too!)

This past June, a very important film for understanding emotions was released called “Inside Out 2.” The original movie, “Inside Out, “released in 2015, put its viewers into the shoes of Riley, a typical pre-teen girl and introduced the viewer to the five major emotions that controlled her life, Joy, Anger, Disgust, Fear, and Sadness, very typical emotions for a girl that age.  As Riley nears puberty and her teenage years, her emotional system takes a sharp turn, and this is where “ Inside Out … [Read more...]

Understanding Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD)

Jon is a 32-year-old construction worker, who recently returned from six years of service in the Middle East. Throughout those years, he only came home on leave three times.  While in combat, he was exposed to some very traumatic events such as picking up body parts of his friends who died, surviving a bomb attack on his platoon, and making raids on populated areas.  He thought he was okay when his service ended, despite the fact, that he did have some nightmares. Since returning home, … [Read more...]

What is Gaslighting?

We often talk about “gaslighting” in connection with a manipulative behavior used by a narcissist in dealing with their victim. The term originated in a 1930's play called Gas Light, in which the main character is attempting to make his wife believe she is going crazy by dimming the lights ever so slightly each day, and convincing her it is all in her head. It was later made into a movie starring Charles Boyer and Ingrid Bergman which emphasized the way male privilege is used to gain power over … [Read more...]

Are You in A Relationship with A Narcissist?

Do you ever wonder why your husband only cares about his interests and activities?  Does he do as much for you as you do for him?  Does your good friend consistently ignore what you care about yet go on  and on about his own needs?  Do you feel unheard even when you take the time to tell your boyfriend what is important to you and how you feel? You might be in a relationship with a narcissist.  Narcissism, a term that is often bandied about casually, is actually a psychiatric diagnosis … [Read more...]