A friend told me recently about a horrible experience she had with a doctor. She was sick, went to an urgent care, and before she could finish reciting her symptoms to the doctor, he told her she needed to lose weight. She left there feeling like all he saw was the way her body looked – not that she was truly sick, not that she was smart and organized, not that she was successful – and his reaction fed right into her own struggles: She had trouble giving herself credit for any of her … [Read more...]
BODY IMAGE: Are We STILL Worrying About That?
As someone who has always struggled with her weight, I have, in recent years, focused on eating healthier, doing more walking, and cherishing the extra energy that gives me. What I have not been doing is focusing solely on what the scale says. I was very pleased to see an autobiography from TV star, Valerie Bertinelli, called “Enough Already” about how the actress and food show host is essentially delivering the same message. The nice thing about famous people writing books about popular topics … [Read more...]
What Qualities Do You Want to Nourish In Yourself?
Recently I read an article by the CEO of Korn Ferry, Gary Burnison, about how to define grace. He sees it as the goodwill of people who help others. During the past year, and before, as we all struggled with the COVID epidemic, there were many examples of people who cared for others, helped them physically and lifted their spirits emotionally. Just think about the people who hung out of the windows of buildings in New York City and cheered for health care workers and first responders. Or the … [Read more...]
The Importance of Feedback
Whether you are talking to a friend, dealing with family, or buying something in a store, feedback is important. If someone has done something nice for you, feedback is a positive reinforcement. If your expectations have been disappointed, sharing your feelings can help the other person do better in the future. Even as a psychologist, it is important to have feedback. I tell all of my new clients that if they are comfortable with me, we will set goals for therapy together. But if they are … [Read more...]
Self-Care for the Holidays
You can feel the intensity starting about a week before Thanksgiving. People are beginning to make lists, worry about family gifts, think about how much money to spend, and stress over getting through all of their holiday responsibilities. It doesn’t matter if you celebrate Christmas, Chanukah, or Kwanza, the pressure is on! Once we make it through the non-denominational Thanksgiving dinner, it is almost as if the anxiety about the holidays becomes more prominent than the holiday itself. … [Read more...]