Warning Signs of an Abuser

Over 15 years ago, the newspaper columnist “Dear Abby” printed a list of characteristics of men who were likely to be abusive in relationships.  I saved it and have given copies to many women and teenage girls.  Specifically, I gave it to those females who said they thought jealousy and controlling behavior were signs of love, whether in a marriage or in a dating relationship. An example would be Steffi, whose husband slowly separated her from her friends and family, took her paycheck every … [Read more...]

11 Ways to Reconnect with Your Partner & Strengthen Your Relationship

Valentine’s Day is over. Perhaps you got flowers, candy, or even jewelry. While these are lovely gifts, they do not have the staying power to improve and nurture a relationship. So what can you do to make sure that you put as much effort into your most important relationship as you do into your job or your favorite hobby? Recently, a young client shared his insight about how to make his marriage better. He noted that he had always seen the marriage as a game of “see who does the most first.” … [Read more...]

To Live and Lie for Love: Reasons People Lie in Relationships

It’s no lie — we all occasionally lie in our relationships. Whether it’s the passing comment after a new haircut “Your new look is great!” or the disastrous date night that ends in “I’ll call you soon”. These lies are everywhere, both the small ones we call “little white lies” and the big ones that can blow up a relationship. Sometimes our lies become habitual, weaving themselves into the fabric of our everyday relationships to such an extent that they go unnoticed by a partner or spouse. … [Read more...]

Verbal Abuse in a Relationship: Know the Signs

The proverb “Home is where the heart is” conjures up warm feelings of good times with family, as our close relationships provide us with the encouragement and comfort needed to live fulfilled, happy lives. Life can be challenging with its financial, emotional and social stresses, and the people who surround and support us at home help us to feel relaxed and comfortable. However, for some, the home is not a sanctuary of love and acceptance; instead, it can be a stressful place where conflict is … [Read more...]

Young Love and A Communication Breakdown

The New York Times January 11th article entitled “The End of Courtship?” by Alex Williams reveals that today’s generation lacks the communication skills needed to find true love and commitment. Thanks to a new "hookup culture" and constant online communication, many 20-somethings are not enjoying the human contact needed to experience empathy, intimacy and understanding – attributions necessary to cultivate healthy relationships with potential life partners. The article talked about how this … [Read more...]