5 Ways (& Whys) To Put Yourself First

fitness

Hillel says “If I am not for myself who will be for me?  But if I am only for myself, who am I?”  In other words, we have an obligation to take care of our world, our community, and our family, but it is also appropriate to take care of ourselves. As the New Year approaches, and many of us think about resolutions for 2017, I loved a short article by Karen Baskin on the meQuilibrium website called 5 Ways (and Whys) to Put Yourself First and have excerpted it below. We know that most of us have … [Read more...]

Warning Signs of an Abuser

Couple conflict on street Leaning On Wall

Over 15 years ago, the newspaper columnist “Dear Abby” printed a list of characteristics of men who were likely to be abusive in relationships.  I saved it and have given copies to many women and teenage girls.  Specifically, I gave it to those females who said they thought jealousy and controlling behavior were signs of love, whether in a marriage or in a dating relationship. An example would be Steffi, whose husband slowly separated her from her friends and family, took her paycheck every … [Read more...]

Are You an Introvert?

Inside my head

   Recently I met with a young man, a professional in a scientific field, who was concerned that his shyness and introversion were hurting him in his profession. Even in a field where hard data is analyzed and replicated, he felt that his personality or ”nature”, as he described it, was hurting him. He preferred to listen and observe in meetings rather than fight for air time to speak. He was not the first one to propose ideas or champion his own projects. As a result, he got negative … [Read more...]

Can You Bounce Back?

Can you bounce back…after something goes wrong, after your kids make you crazy, after a difficult phone call with a client, after a day filled with anxiety-provoking events? The ability to bounce back is called resilience and it is key to managing our lives with strength and skill. Many of us are so busy trying to achieve, trying to manage our children’s lives, trying to be the best at what we do, that we feel we are in a perpetual state of stress. If we do not come down from that state, we … [Read more...]

Letting Go of Perfect: Letting Go of Perfectionism for Good

Woman cutting Grass

Part 3 of my "Letting Go of Perfect" series. Well, we are not even into Spring and I would bet that most of us have either thrown our New Year’s resolutions in the trash, given up on them, or didn’t even bother to make any. Part of the reason we do that is that they are too big, too hard, and set the bar too high. In many ways our resolutions are a lot like the things we say to ourselves about being perfect. We may try so hard to be perfect, to do things perfectly, to aspire to perfection, … [Read more...]